Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Chapter 1

I discovered pretty quickly that this handsome drew guy was not my type. I thought he was cocky and not at all friendly to the girls in the group. It is just as well that I got this (weird ) impression because I was able to then focus on making other girl friends and really seeking the Lord. It is funny because when I look back I realize that the speaker was not good at all, the small group times were okay and the games... well I already told you how I feel about games. However, the Lord did a major work in my heart. I felt like the Lord took me to the next step... no more emotional camp decisions, I was leaving home and going to have to get real about my faith all on my own. I remember driving home with my "friend" and we both talked and talked about what the Lord had taught us. I then got home and talked my dad's ear off until the wee hours of the morning. Then I went upstairs and journaled, cried and prayed some more. It was crazy. I really do see that as a huge step in my life; where I let old things go (destructive patterns and such) and opened my mind and heart to what the Lord would show me in this next chapter of my life.
So I went off to college. I didn't really know any one. One of the great things about any fish camp is that your counselors are supposed to hang out with you and make sure you know you way around campus and stuff before the first day. Well, I had made a lot of neat friends my age from Impact and so almost immediately we all started to hang out. Drew had connected with several of the guys I had become friends with and thus our groups ended up colliding. I am pretty sure my leaders held some get-togethers but the main thing I remember was my first Midnight Yell. At A&M this is a tradition where the students gather in the stands to practice all the yells (cheers) before the big game the next day. You are supposed to go with a date and since we kiss at every touch down they "practice" that as well. Well, I went with a group and it was still "complicated" with my friend and I and so we were all just goofing around the whole time. We were surprised when a bunch of guys started talking to us and it was Drew and his roomies. We laughed with them the whole time and then decided to hang out together afterwards. I am pretty sure I made a few of my guy peers a little mad that I was gravitating to these older guys.
We left yell practice to head to some one's house to hang out and as we were walking through the President's yard the sprinklers came on. Well, grass already makes me really itchy and wet grass is only that much worse. So I was picking my way through when this Drew guy scooped me off my feet and ran me through all the sprinklers to the other side. I am pretty sure we can all hear this little freshman girl's heart beating hard at this point.
We all continued to hang out off and on and then I got a personal invitation from Drew to a party he was having at his house. This didn't seem weird b/c I had hung out with him and the others several times. Well, he came to pick me up (I think he actually sent his roomie to get me... but we were friends by this point) and when I got there I realized I was the only person from our Impact group... in fact I was the only freshman. Well, I knew I had to act cool. I didn't search Drew out but simply sat with the first people I saw and introduced myself and started playing a game with them (by now you know what a sacrifice this was... but I had to be chill). Pretty soon I felt that I fit in and every one treated me as part of the group. Eventually we all settled down to watch a movie and Drew finally came and sat by me and said hey. To this day I wish I knew what he had been thinking. Did he expect I would come and find him or hang out with him or did he think anything of it at all. Who knows. Drew doesn't remember.
This was the first of many more parties that followed. It became so common for me to be at the house on Wolfrun Road. Sometimes I would bring my girlfriends or other Impact buddies. Sometimes Drew would invite me or sometimes his roomies or his brother would invite me and Drew wouldn't even be there. We ate a lot of pizza, Chili's and saw a lot of movies.
Fast forward to the end of the fall semester. We've been hanging out like this off and on. I had a few crushes that semester but I was also really involved in a lot of freshman groups, church and honors classes... so it wasn't like I was pining after this one guy. Sometimes there was flirting, sometimes not... over all it was a mystery.
Right before Christmas Break A&M hosted a campus wide dance and I was on the committee that sort of helped out with it. I went with the people from my freshman club but I invited Drew to come along when he finished bible study. I didn't think he would. I got all dressed up and went and just as I was leaving I got a call from Drew saying he was finally there... it was all but over. It turns out some one had stolen his dress pants while he was in Bible Study and thus had delayed him from coming right away... I tried to play it cool. We ditched the dance and headed to his place for a movie. No one was there, at least no one awake and we watched some random western movie (smooth move on his part... ha). I remember it was one of the first times we had been alone, sat that close or felt that on fire! hahahaha. I was excited and annoyed by all the mystery at this point. After the movie he drove me back to campus and as I got out of the car (it was really cold) he said "wait" or something like that and jumped out of the car. I thought he was going to open the door for me (it was locked with out a key card though) but then he just stood there. ummmmm, YES? it's kinda cold out here!!! Finally he said something like, "I just wanted to tell you... that I like you".

Saturday, June 27, 2009


**disclaimer** this story will be written as accurately as I remember it. details are admittedly from my own perspective... I think my husband is the most wonderful man I know and I am so thankful that the Lord has grown and changed both of us over the years and I pray He continues to do so.... now on with the story!

August 2006

High School is finally over, the braces are off and my eyebrows are waxed. I am going to college.
I won't go into all the details of how I chose Texas A&M as my school of choice... in fact, I mostly just said okay. There were too many choices and too many people with something to say about it and something invested in it and so I just made the most obvious good choice.
The summer before I was to attend my first semester at A&M the brochures started piling up. There were so many activities you could participate in and things to enroll in and choices to make. The main thing people tell you about is fish camp. At A&M fish camp is practically another religion. "Everybody" goes and "everybody" loves it and you won't have "any" friends if you skip it. I just had one major problem. On the brochure there were pictures of people with pies in their faces, straws up their noses and covered in mud or various other things. This was just not appealing to me at all... it still isn't. The thing I hate most about youth camp, every single year I went, was all the stupid games. I never thought it was fun to have gross things tossed, batted or smeared on my person. I never wanted to act like an idiot on purpose or have people laugh at me and I especially hated getting dirty... now I don't mind to sweat a little or get dirty when you are doing something productive like gardening, but I've never been one to enjoy putting muck all over myself for fun. So.... I said no thanks. I think people worried I would have no friends, was antisocial or not handling the pressures of college well... really those pictures on the brochure just haunted me. So no thanks it was.
Then we got a brochure about another kind of fish camp but it was a Christian camp thing run by students. It was a way to meet other believers, meet people from all the local churches and find organizations where other Christians were. I was still a little hesitant b/c any camp environment promises to have its quirks and mandatory weirdness but at least it seemed more beneficial to me overall than the previous. So I signed up.
So here I am August of 2006 among hundreds of other soon-to-be freshman of whom I only know one person and it was "complicated" between us... if you know what I mean. We sat in a concrete parking lot the size of many many football fields with the heat and humidity both well over 100. Finally the buses arrive and we are loaded on like cattle and just our luck, there is no AC on these buses either. I some how make it all the way to the back row where I am crowded between four other people. I am so hot at this point all of my clothes are soaked through. There is no water and I literally am struggling to hold back tears (some of which did silently slip down). I hated this place already. I wanted to go home and spend the last few weeks of my freedom with friends and family and an AC! I hated that the only person I knew was getting to know quite a few pretty girls and was leaving me all alone to my thoughts and fears. A couple of buses caught on fire and/or overheated and then finally we got there.
We were herded like cattle again into separate "camps" that were randomly assigned and given names of the tribes of Israel. I was yellow, Issachar. Who has ever even heard of that guy? haha After learning a few chants (nothing rhymes with Issachar) and other camp like activities that are supposed to get you pumped up (I think we were all just relieved to have some AC and water we would've let them do anything to us at that point) we were divided into small groups with in our "camp". So one by one all the counselors introduced themselves. Some were goofy, some were serious, some were girly and some were athletic. Then they showed us which ones were pairs and I noticed that one of the prettiest girls and the hottest guy were partners. I thought, "please do not let me be in that group". I knew I would be distracted and feel like a total loser in that group so I prayed that I would get some one else... out of like 10 small groups surely the odds were in my favor. One by one the couples called out the people in their groups. Half way through my heart started to sink again... this camp was really not working out for me thus far. The last group to be called was Mr. and Ms. Hottie's group and guess who was still sitting waiting for her name to be called, me.
So we divided up into our groups and the leaders reintroduced themselves and gave more details as they handed us our folders (my name was mispelled)... I'm Lindsay and this is my partner... Drew.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Twue Wuv

My dad sent me a link to this article
This wasn't a new idea to me but something good to reflect on, especially since we are having a little girl (who will probably dream of love and romance). To summarize, the author speaks about women today being infatuated with romance novels and movies and how this can lead to sin and discontentment in our lives.
In college I was an English Literature major and thus I have read and loved every classic book out there, for the most part. My favorites were definitely those by Jane Austin, the Bronte sisters and Christina Rossetti. In most, if not all of these books, characters are looking for and sometimes finding love and marriage. This article compares this type of reading to basically "girl-porn". I thought the argument was well laid out and thought out but I'm not totally on board (though I think the author herself was very balanced in her view as well). I do think that chick flicks and even some drama depict life to all people, but especially women, in an unrealistic way. I refuse to see most movies that involve a lot of sex or even romantic trauma because I have enough of that in real life and because it often makes me yearn for a different life than the simple one I already have. Example A.... PS. I Love You. I really don't understand why any one would want to see this movie. Since we live in the dark ages with out tv and commercials (which I am so thankful for) I had not heard of this movie until my sister mentioned it to me. I asked her what it was about and gave her permission to "ruin it" for me. She told me that it was about this newly married couple and how the husband dies....wait...stop... no thank you. Did I mention that at the time I was a newlywed girl myself, often overcome by fear and anxiety that this very thing would happen to my beloved? So why on earth would I go and torture myself like that? There is so much real pain in life, I don't need to be crying for this actress and her fake man. And, PS. if you are a husband to a young wife... it is a really sweet idea to set things up for her in advance to remind her that you loved her but there is also a point where you need to let her move on... I mean was she ever going to find normalcy with letters randomly appearing from her dead husband!?
Oh, I digress.
So, about the novels. Yes, I think that often times these novels make us women discontent with the men that we do have in our lives and we often make our standards different from God's standards. But I would argue that most women do not even need these books to deviate from God's standards. I remember in middle school, long before my reading days began in earnest, we had to list characteristics we would like to see in a husband and I really remember some of the stuff we said and it stuck with me and some things, shallow though they were, were really hard to get over since we had held on to them for so long. Things that were on my group's list: big hands, short nails, long hair, dark hair, tall, blue eyes, strong, play guitar, play sports, tan.... gag. Why did our teachers even let us write these things down?!?! I don't even remember being encouraged to know what godly characteristics in a spouse might be (until I was much older at least... any my parents did teach me at home).
SO, while I do think that women who find themselves obsessed with these books and discontent with life should refocus... I also think that it can be good to read the classics and redeem the good in them. (For instance, a dislike for pride and a love for honesty and charity).
On a different note, it's important for those of us who are married or just older and wiser (I'm the married but not the wiser) to inform the next generation about God's standards for marriage. It is important for women to teach other women what it looks like to be a godly wife. It is important we let others learn from our mistakes and triumphs in dating and marriage so that they can become wise women to teach the generation after them. It wasn't until college that I heard that I wasn't supposed to be hunting a spouse or that the man of my dreams might be some one I least expected (and it was!).
So, to begin this endeavor myself, I am going to post installments of my love story. I think that the story of how Drew and I became husband and wife is just as intense and thrilling as any book on the shelves and so I am going to share it, in detail, with all of you and hope that through it I can convey the ways God changed both of our hearts and how those changes made a foundation (on Christ) that has not failed us in marriage.

Friday, June 19, 2009


Well, we are finally back in Louisville after all our many traveling adventures. Last week we left for four days to go to Duxbury, MA. Drew's great aunt passed away back in the late fall/early winter and the family decided to wait and do her memorial in the summer when every one would be able to come in. She left Drew's mom her house in Duxbury that was built by her parents in the early 1900's (like 1907 or something... Susan could tell you). This place is amazing. The town itself is like stepping back in time. There are no cigarettes on the street and every one keeps their lawn mowed and full of fresh blooming flowers. I think over half the town has an ocean view. It's just a wonderful place over all and we love going there every summer. We took the camera again, promising each other to take at least one picture but we didn't. We were having too much fun with all the family to remember such a detail... plus Susan and Gran and other family members take enough pictures to last any one a lifetime (we love you guys). It was especially great to be with Drew's brothers and their respective others, this is the most we've been around them all in one year and they are each so different and fun. We ate a lot of apples, went on a lot of walks and ate a lot of cape cod chips! What more could you want in a weekend?!
So, you don't leave without a picture... I am going to post a picture of the bedding we are hoping to use for Stella Jane (if I can ever find a good deal on a crib!). The brown and white polka dots is what we are using for the bumper and dust ruffle (and I really like that crib too!) and then the pink/yellow/brown is the crib sheet we are using... well one of them. We registered for more sheets but these are the things we already bought b/c they were on sale and I was afraid they would be sold out before I had a shower of any sort.
I'm also officially unemployed... well, actually full time employed at home! Yesterday I vacuumed and mopped and cooked dinner after running many errands and meeting with my mentor. One of my errands was to the nose doctor and I am happy to report a clean bill of health! He scared me for a second when he said he thought he found a pollyp but after further investigating (which, by the way is not so pleasant!) it turned out to just be gunk and not permanent! YAHOO! I was going to be so disappointed if I had another issue on the horizon. Ever since we went to Dallas (shakes fist at cats) I have been fighting off a massive infection but I thought I had concurred it while we were in Duxbury... something about that ocean air seemed to clear me out... so all that to say, I was hoping to not have any permanent issues and so far so good!! That means I have a good chance of breathing through the rest of this pregnancy and getting to nurse Stella for longer (since I won't have any impending surgeries). Praise the Lord that he has kept my allergies at bay and given me healing through out this season. Please continue to pray that I can maintain a healthy nose!
Sorry this is all so jumbled... I am sort of scatter brained today! I have another OB appointment today as well so pray for that and that Stella will be healthy and her mom won't have gained too much weight... I am growing rather rapidly lately!
About those pictures....

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Baby News

22 Weeks... over half way!

I have great baby news... well baby-mama news. I am officially wearing maternity pants! That's right, today I am breaking in my brand new maternity jeans.
Now, the fact that I am wearing these clothes is only trumped by the sheer wonder of how I got these clothes. You see, no one seemed to be loaning out summer maternity clothes and so I have been stuck with a couple of skirts and dresses and a white and black shirt. Now, these are fabulous clothes but a little boring after a while and when I don't want to shave my legs. I had ordered a nice pair of gap maternity jeans over a month ago with a gift card from Christmas. Well, they fit but were a little difficult to get on and off and since I am only getting bigger, I figured that was a bad idea. Since there are no gap maternity places in this town I had to mail them back in and try and exchange them. This is the third time I have done this with their maternity clothes! Well, the jeans I really wanted they no longer carried in my size, and thus I had another gift card. Well, I heard from a wonderful friend that there was some sort of outlet that had everything under $10 for gap/banana/old navy. Well upon further research I found there was a gap clearance store just an hour and a half away. So, I begged my skinny friend to come with me and we made a road trip yesterday. She didn't have as much luck as me, but she also can be more picky with a whole closet of clothes that still fit. After hours of search and an hour of trying on (bleh) I came out with some GREAT steals. I got a pair of gap maternity jeans, originally over $50 for $6.99. I also got two short sleeved jackets and another cami all for 12.99 (combined). I got a sweater for 4.99 along with a pair of brown and a pair of black capris for 4.99 each. I also got a pair of pink capri sweat pants (mostly for the hospital stay and after) for around $2. I bought two baby onesies (brown and argyle) and a long sleeve tshirt all for under $10. WOO HOO! If we had more time I am sure I could've found even more great deals. They had dresses and shoes and unmentionables all for a steal. I might take Drew there if he ever has a job that doesn't require a suit.. it is so much like a thrift store I think he might like it.
In other baby news, Stella Jane is a very active girl. I feel her several times a day doing summersaults and kicking me... especially in the bladder! Drew has been able to feel her just about every day and we can even see her move from the outside sometimes. He has been talking to her more and more, which makes this emotional woman all hot in the eyes every time.
I am also reading a book by Dr. Bradley, of the Bradley method, called Husband Coached Childbirthing. It's a good book but also pretty outdated and kindof like propaganda. They are extreme but really get me pumped up to go natural. I have moments where this scares me to death but I think if we really prepare I might be able to actually make it. Of course, one thing we have learned again and again is how uncontrollable this whole thing is. I might labor for days and then be unable to make it natural or she might refuse to turn or show knows what. But we are going to try and prepare for natural. Next month we start a natural child birth class that is led by a Bradley and Lamaze instructor. I am excited b/c it is the only class of it's kind and really new to this area. I hope to get a more balanced perspective.. plus it's cheaper. I am also already preregistered at the hospital!
We had found the perfect place in Chicago to have our babymoon but the guy just emailed me and informed me that they have TWO indoor cats. I really don't understand why people do this. Cat allergies are one of the more common allergies and so a public place like this should really not have cats. I seriously wanted to cry. I've spent hours looking for the perfect place with the perfect price. We were going to go kayaking on the great lakes and visit this oh-so-cool and unknown city! I am hoping to find another place in the same area but if not, then I will probably just book with the B&B here in town we used last year for our anniversary... it was so nice and much cheaper but less exciting of a location.
Tomorrow we hit the sky again for another trip. I am so excited to head to the north east again but traveling is harder and harder with this belly of mine and I get tired so easily. However, I would not pass up this trip or the chance to be with family for all the naps in the world. I can't wait to see the newlyweds!
Until I have internet again, God bless!

the clothes...

Thursday, June 4, 2009

No Pictures

Well, I have been with out internet access or time to access it even if it was accessible.
Last week our beloved brother Chris Lewis got married to a wonderful and beautiful woman.
Leading up to the wedding was perfect mania of non-stop prewedding craziness! We did programs, lunch. our nails, cakes, JD's, rehearsals, pictures, dinner, decorating, more decorating and finally a wedding.
It was hard for this pregnant woman to keep up with all these skinny women... it really made me realize how much slower I am "with child". I was having a hard time keeping up the 12 hr + schedule with long breaks between meals. Drew and I would barely see each other it seems and often would fall alseep with all our clothes on and the light on... it was like once we stopped, we just blacked out until that terrible alarm. My husband's fancy phone alarm is only very slightly less annoying than his alarm at home. The tune was all too cheery and all too like a march... I need something subtle in the morning to ward off grumpiness. (did I ever mention that I had an alarm that crowed like a rooster as I entered into adolescence? and my parents wondered why the teens make a child grumpy! I paid them back for that gift though by forgetting to turn it off on the weekends when I was out of town... hehehe... unintentional justice! just kidding mom and dad... about paying back... not about the annoyingness of the rooster)
The wedding was so beautiful. I didn't think I would get emotional but seeing Drew's older brother's lip quiver and tears streak his cheeks (choking up his dad as well) was too much for this hormonal mom-to-be. The vows were beautiful and deep, reminding me of my love for the tall man standing across from me... he made eye contact with me a few times and told me through his look that he loved me and still meant those vows and I almost lost it again (or was it still...).
The reception couldn't have been more fun as we ate, danced and spoke with long lost friends from New Zealand and lots of family and friends from Dallas. It was beautiful... and we should know, we spent all day decorating the place!
The next day we stuffed our faces with those dear friends from New Zealand... well they aren't from there but recently back from there. Drew's bestie from college and his wonderful wife and friend. We then took our two pregnant selves on the hottest walk around a lake and caught up on all the gory details of marriage and pregnancy. She is the friend that taught me to be blunt, we can talk about ANYTHING with out blushing! haha they are so dear and due only 6 days after us! We are rooting for a boy and for an arranged marriage!
Then we went back to the Dallas fam to announce our baby name. Again, choosing a name hasn't been very emotional for me, more exciting and thoughtful than anything. But as soon as we announced it Susan started crying, which got both Drew and I choking on our words.
Oh, you want to know the name too?
Stella Jane

Stella for the light that has come from God into our hearts and the light that we are to be in this dark world... and conveniently also the name of Drew's maternal gma... gran.
Jane, which means the Lord is gracious.... we pray that as Stella is a light to the world and is filled with the Light that she will show the world that the Lord is gracious and realize his graciousness to her.
There are a few verses we have chosen to pray over our child that go with her name but this post is already long.

And though we took our nice camera all the way to Texas and back... we did not take a single picture. Remember, we were busy! haha. But I do have a few from the house renovations!