Now that we're all friends, it's probably time for you to meet a very special person in my life. This person has shared my bed, ran around with no cloths on and been through many many trials with me. Her name is Blue Baby.
That's right, I was a very creative child and named my favorite doll in the blue dress... blue baby. I can't even look at her and think of another name that would be suitable. The story goes that whenever I got a doll, and it was true for blue baby, I always took their cloths off right away. When asked why I simply stated that they were more comfortable that way. I don't think we knew where Blue Baby's blue dress was for a long time and then suddenly it appeared and by then I was old enough to be a little more gentle with her and so we sewed it back on.
Well, while I was home for all the baby shower greatness I picked up a few childhood memories to bring home to Louisville for Stella Jane. Blue baby, even with her dirty face and dress (which is in the wash as I type), my very special pink blanket (the only pink thing I think I liked until college) and a very beautiful white shelf that my grandfather gave to me in late elementary to hold all my antique dishes. All of these things made their way with us back to Louisville and will be having a big debut in the upstairs room awaiting their new owner/tormentor... Stella. I'm not usually super sentimental but there is something really sweet about being able to give these treasures to my own daughter.
I can't even believe I can type that... I can't really believe that there is a baby, about the size of, if not bigger than, blue baby in me right now... blinking and sucking and moving around. It's just weird to see a newborn and think that we will have one of those and our lives will forever change. It's weird because I can't know what it's like until I am there. I have a wonderful mentor, a wonderful family full of mothers, lots of books and a great birthing class and yet I cannot fully grasp what labor will be like, because I've never experienced anything like it. I can't have any idea what it will be like to hold my own child, the perfect product of Drew and my union. I can't conceive that this person is a little of him and me and that she is unlike any other person on the face of the earth. I don't know how she will affect me and my marriage... I just can't know any of these things until she is here and we begin the journey. It's so weird to do all this planning and preparing and yet to know, I have no clue!
So without further ado.... meet Blue Baby